Are you ready to declutter but the items you want to get rid of are not yours?  When is it okay to throw away or donate other's possessions?  

There are some specific circumstances when it’s okay:

• When you have received explicit permission to do so. There are times when I am working with a client in their master bedroom and their spouse is not present, nor wishes to participate in the process at that time.  Sometimes that spouse or partner will accept, or even appreciate, having the other manage his or her wardrobe decluttering for them. Sometimes, it's an elderly parent who might appreciate some help with the decluttering. They might give you some general guidelines to follow but otherwise allow you to decide what stays and what goes.
• When the other person is a child who is too young to make such decisions.What is too young? Keep in mind that some children as young as three years old can be involved in the decluttering process.  They know what they like and do not like at that age and begin to start making decisions on what to keep and what to get rid of.  I find that parents are sometimes surprised at how much their children are willing to discard.
• When you have the legal authority to make decisions for someone who can no longer make decisions for himself or herself. This scenario can come into play when you are dealing with an elderly person, a person who has a health issue that does not enable them to make decisions on their own, or, in certain circumstances, a hoarder who has provided a Power of Attorney to either a family member or someone else to make decisions on their behalf.  (I personally worked on a hoarding project several years ago where an attorney had Power of Attorney to make decisions for the client and hired me to bring order back into the home.)    

In general, however, it’s disrespectful to get rid of another person’s belongings, and it can build up resentment and distrust that have a wide range of negative repercussions. What can you do instead? The following are some suggestions:

• Have a discussion about the items in question, where each party listens respectfully to the other person’s position. There’s always a chance that if you calmly explain why you’d like something to be discarded you can convince the other person to go along with you. Perhaps, when you better understand why someone wants to keep something that you want to discard, you’ll change your mind and decide it’s fine to have it stay. 
• Reach a compromise. This is the basis of a good relationship.  Perhaps your husband has a pair of old, beat-up shorts that he loves to wear because they are comfortable and is not willing to part with them, as much as you do not like seeing him in them.  Why not agree that he can keep the shorts but not to wear them when the two of you go out together.  If there’s a disputed item of décor, maybe it can be displayed in a spot in the home where you rarely go.
• Agree on boundaries. It might be okay to keep a pile of t-shirts for memorabilia purposes, but it needs tobe able to fit within a designated space: a dresser drawer, a storage box to be kept on the top shelf in the closet, or perhaps a shelf in the garage.  It's about what is a reasonable amount to keep. Pick a number that will work and select from there.  
• Bring in a professional organizer. An impartial third party with recognized expertise can ask the right questions and make suggestions, all while avoiding the emotional landmines that can be triggered when a spouse or partner makes suggestions to the other. (I am proud to say I have been told over the years that I have saved a lot of marriages.) The process can be stressful but a professional knows how to approach the situation and keep it calm.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           If you are interested in eliminating the clutter that has accumulated anywhere in your home and want to avoid conflict with your partner, spouse or child or have been assigned the task of eliminating someone else's clutter and feeling overwhelmed, don't hesitate to contact me.  I am here to help you get through the process and reduce the stress.

I just returned from a whirlwind two week adventure on the back of a Harley Davidson motorcycle. Five others along with myself rode three motorcycles about 5800 miles from Pennsylvania to Ohio, Indianapolis, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnasota, North Dakota, Montana, Wyoming, South Dakota, Nebraska, Iowa, Missouri, Illinois, Indianapolis, Ohio and back to Pennsylvania.  

We saw some amazing sites including Glacier National Park, Badlands National Park, Devils Tower, Sturgis, Mt Rushmore and Mark Twain's hometown in Hannibal, MO among others.

The minimalistic part of this trip was a major challenge for me. I am used to having all of my clothing and accessories at my fingertips.  However, when you share a piece of luggage strapped onto the back of the Harley and have to life out of it for fourteen days, staying in a different hotel every night, you quickly learn how to be a minimalist.  

We each packed for only four days, having to do laundry several times throughout the trip.  I packed only 4 sleeveless, 4 shortsleeve, 4 longsleeve and two fleese tops along with 2 pair of pants, 1 pair of shorts, underware and socks for 4 days and 4 night shirts.  All accessories were travel size.  We relied on hotel shampoo, conditioner and soap for the most part and no blow dryer. I packed one pair of sneaks and one pair of flip flops along with a full set of raingear especially made for the Harley, a wind jacket, denim jacket and leather jacket for those cold and windy days and nights.  I lived mostly in my Harley boots.  It's amazing what you can fit in half of a suitcase that you share with your significant other. We packed all of our clothing by category and labeled each plastic bag they were stored in (after kneeling on them to squeeze the air out of them) to help quickly identify what we needed when we needed it as we traveled.

Riding on the bike for 14 days gave me a lot of time to reflect.

I began to feel that I was so materialistic at home, with choices of so many types of clothing at my fingertips and how I could actually survive and still be comfortable with so little while travelling.  It certainly gave me a whole new perspective. (Mind you, I have no intention of personally going more minimalistic at home. I did get tired of wearing the same clothing over and over again!)

The moral to this story is that, it is possible to live a much more simple life, if you so choose.  It's all a matter of mindset.

This lesson in life will stay with me for years to come and I will share it will my current and future clients to encourage them when they want to downsize and live a much more minimalistic life - focusing more on the important things in life and less on the material things.

If you need any personal help with downsizing and/or living a more minimalistic life, I can show you, first hand, how to do just that. As they say, "been there, done that"! 

Being organized does not just pertain to adults.  It benefits children as well.   

Did you know that you can actually boost your child's confidence, their ability to learn and their maturity level by helping them to create order in their life? 

Being organized is more than just a clean room.  For adults and children alike, it is essential for learning.  If you don't have the materials you need to ace a test or you are surrounded by clutter, it affects your ability to focus.

Organization encourages responsibility.  For children, it can be as simple as cleaning up their toys and putting them into clearly marked containers.  When your child is organized, they become more independent and their frustration level is reduced.  If they know what they want and where to find it, they can do more things on their own, which gives them a great sense of independence and self-esteem.

A few habits is all it takes to help your child develop organizing skills.  There are techniques that work for younger children as well as older children.  

1.  Neatly storing their things:

Younger children can get involved with cleanup. Make it fun by setting a timer and creating a pick-up game that lasts about 10 minutes. If you have more than one child, get the entire family involved.  Get your child used to cleaning up as they go and doing a final sweep at the end of the day.  By the time your child reaches grade school, they will be able to keep their toys organized on their own.  Using simple containers set up by category and labeled with pictures of the type of toy or game will make clean up a breeze. 

When it comes to older children, pointing out their successes will encourage them to do more.  Your grade schooler or tween can clean up toys and games, help clear their dishes off the dinner table, dust and hang up their jacket.  Show them examples of what they are already doing and what else they could also be doing. Make it easy for them to be successful.  When your child sees that they already know how to be neat, the task will feel more doable to them.  

2. Time Management and Routines:  

Younger children do not have a concept of time. However, that does not mean they cannot be taught promptness; it's just a matter of creating routines. For example, every night is "bath, book, bed". If it is verbally stated before the routine is to start and implemented each night, they will get accustomed to staying on schedule. 

Older children need to learn not to procrastinate. This can be taught by requiring your child to lay out their clothes the night before or plan out a long-term school project a week or so in advance.  

3. Completing the task: 

Younger children can learn this concept as young as 1 year old.  Read them a story from beginning to end at bedtime.  They are taught that things have a beginning, middle and an end. Referring back to what I mentioned above, having your child put away a toy after they play with it before pulling out another toy will teach them task completion, as well.  When they are working on a larger project, like a Lego structure, however, you might decide it's okay to leave it for another time to complete.  This will teach them how to manage long-term projects.

Older children need to learn rules and limits.  Older children get distracted by technology, which is a big hindrence for teens when it comes to completing homework or a chore around the house. Set up tech-free zones in the home and create a quiet place for your child to study. Set time limits as to how long and when they are permitted to use a gaming device or their phone for texting.

Lastly, practice what you preach.  Children learn by example, so be sure to follow the rules when it comes to these areas.  

If you are overwhelmed with your own clutter or your child's, I can help.  I work with busy moms to organize their homes and their time, as well as working with their children to create an organized bedroom or playroom and create time management plans for the family.  Don't hesitate to contact me to discuss your particular clutter issues.

In a few months, I will be celebrating another birthday.  As I get older and reflect on my life, I recognize how much we, as adults, evolve and change.

Our ideas about how we want to live our lives, our priorities and other decisions we are confronted with as we get older naturally change.

One of the ways we change, and might not recognize, is our priorities.  Think about it.  It is not only about who we socialize with, live with, spend time with, things we want to do or achieve, but the items we feel we want to hold on to.

Our priorities change as to what we want to keep.  

When working with my clients who have gathered items for a long period of time, I find it interesting how we go through those items and they find that some of what they felt was so important to hold on to, is no longer that important.

Sometimes, it's not the item itself, but the number of items we keep.  For example, do we need to hold onto such a large number of a particular item, or is it possible to pare it down to a smaller number which can be appreciated and perhaps still evoke a fond memory of the person it once belonged to? 

Interestingly enough, my son created a Memory Box when his father died. He was six years old at the time. We make a habit of reviewing that Memory Box once a year.  Not only does he get to go down memory lane, but he sometimes finds that there is an item or two that no longer hold the same significance as they once did, and he can part with them.  

I once had a client who had held onto a box of handkerchiefs that belonged to her deceased husband's deceased parent.  When we found the box on a shelf in her coat closet, we opened it up and she looked at the handkerchiefs she had not seen in years.  When I asked her why she had held on to so many, she said because they belonged to her late husband.  I explained that now they belonged to her.  What connection did she have to them?  Did she need to hold on to almost 100 handkerchiefs?  She realized she did not and reduced the box down to ten of her favorite, instead. 

Is it possible that you have items in your home that you have been holding on to for years and have not looked at for a long time that do not carry as much significance as they once did? Have your tastes evolved? 

The next time you are decluttering and organizing your home, take this into consideration.  Are you ready to participate in an "evolution revolution"?  If so, you will find that those items you are saving will take up a lot less room if they are pared down to what means the most to you.

If you need assistance in determining what to keep and what to donate or trash, don't hesitate to contact me. I am here to help.

Mother's Day is only a few days away.  

Due to the fact that I work with so many moms, I am aware of how little so many of them value themselves.  Yes, they recognize that they wear many hats, such as caregiver, chauffeur, chef, cleaning service, bookkeeper and do so many things to keep the household running.

As Mother's Day approaches, I am wondering whether you and your family know how valuable you are.

As you may know, one of the most common issues I deal with in my clients' homes is paper management.  Having a background as a paralegal working for an estate attorney, I am aware of the legal documents everyone should have, as well as having a life insurance policy.

So many times, I hear that my clients - the busy moms who are trying to balance all of their responsibilities and are just too overwhelmed to get and stay organized - do not have a Will, Living Will, Power of Attorney or a life insurance policy for themselves.

So many "stay-at-home" moms do not recognize their own value and don't think it's necessary.  

Let me ask you a question?   What would it take to replace you if something should happen to you, leaving your family without a Mom?

The misconception that you need to work full-time outside the home and can simply rely on your spouse to provide the only life insurance for the family is a dangerous one.

As a woman who advocates for busy moms, I urge you to take some time to consider getting a Will, Living Will, Power of Attorney and life insurance policy to insure that your family is protected in case something should happen to you.  Have a discussion with your spouse or significant other and take the steps necessary to put these pieces into place as soon as possible.

When I work with my clients, we have a discussion about the documents that might be missing.  For me, it's not just about making the papers in their filing system look pretty.  It's about the function and the whole picture, including critical documents they need to have.

Do you have them?  Don't you think this is something you should think about and discuss with your significant other and family?     

Consider this my Mother's Day present to you.  I would love nothing more than to know that all moms are fully taking care of their families.  

Have a great Mother's Day.  

The other day I heard an oldie on the radio and it prompted me to think about clutter.  Strange, I know, but hear me out.  

Do you know the song "How Long Has This Been Going On?" by Ace https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAVl_IJV5eI

I find that I ask this question with so many of my clients when I first speak with them and now, I want to ask you the same question.

Do you have ongoing clutter issues that won't go away?  Do you think your situation can be remedied overnight?  

The fact remains that if your clutter has been accumulating for quite some time - months, even years - it will take some time to eliminate it and get organized.

The good news is, however, that it can be done!   

I know how overwhelming it can be.  Sometimes you feel that it is just easier to ignore it. Is that the real solution?  No!

At some point it needs to be dealt with, so why not now?  

Just imagine what it would be like to walk into a particular room (or perhaps many rooms in your home) and feel that immediate sense of calm.  Eliminating clutter and getting organized can do just that!  

Sometimes it is so overwhelming that you don't know where to start.  Sometimes the answer is to reach out for help and hire a professional.  

You and I both know that if we cannot do something on our own, the best solution is to engage the services of a professional.  I do it!  I hire an electrician, plumber, handyman.  Why? Because I don't always know what I am doing and it will take too long for me to figure it out on my own. Also, I want it done once and I want it done right.

The same applies when it comes to clutter and disorganization. Don't you want it done once and for all and don't you want it done right?  Wouldn't it be great to have someone come in who can provide a new perspective and create a solution that meets your specific needs and provide ideas you might never have thought of before? 

As a professional organizer who has specialized in residential organizing for so long, trust me, I know how to do it once and do it right!

So, ask yourself.  HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON?  If your answer is months or even years, and you are ready to get past this obstacle and commit to the process, it's time to reach out for help.  Simply pick up that phone now and contact A Better Space.  You'll be so glad you did!  I would love to provide you with a space that you love. 

As a professional organizer, I work with a lot of very creative people.  Many of my clients have so many creative talents or have a passion for creativity, including artwork.

One of the more common issues that comes up is how and where to display their artwork.  

I love art in many forms and can appreciate the passion to collect it.  However, it can become clutter.

It is very important to keep in mind, when purchasing artwork, that you are able to visualize where it is going to live when it arrives in your home.  

Just like everything else in life, all of it cannot be your favorite.  If you tend to hang everything you own on all of the walls in your home, you are defeating the purpose of featuring the art that you love.  It just becomes clutter.  Artwork needs to be appreciated and it cannot if it is surrounded by lots of other pieces.  It does not stand out from the crowd.  When viewed, you are distracted by all of the other pieces around it.  It is important to hang your artwork sparingly and in a way that complements your decor.  You want to be particular about what you display on your walls

Here are some basic rules to follow:

1.   Use your artwork to balance your room's visual space.  Sometimes large art can feel overwhelming but, if you are aiming for it to be your room's focal point, the rules can change.   Rows of smaller pieces in idential frames and mats make the arrangement a piece of art in itself.  The symmetry draws your eye into the frame itself, emphasizing the art inside.  For a more eclectic arrangement, try mixing and matching size.  Also, aim to keep your art at eye level.  Most people tend to hang their art too high to be truly appreciated.    

2.  Determine the format you wish to use.  Most interior designers airm for a rule of three or an odd number when hanging art arrangements.  Interestingly enough, odd numbered displays tend to feel more balance.  If you choose to go with even numbers, a grid can help balance out the display's visual space.  If you want to make the room look longer, make the display horizontal.  If you want the ceilings to look higher, hang your display vertically. The other alternative is to simply arrange your artwork organically.  Just do what you think looks best, but be sure to plan it out first.  You can arrange the pieces on the floor in front of your wall first, and then move to the wall and mark their places lightly with a pencil. 

3.  Select your style. You can stick with one style, color or artist for a more cohesive look.  This tends to work best in a more refined space with a single framing style.  If you want to be more playful, hang clocks and mirrors on the wall along with other 3 dimentional elements.  Although variety can be interesting, try to find a way to have some elements tie the display together, whether it is frames of the same color or art with the same type of finish.  

4. Tell a story.  A gallery wall should depict who you are and what makes you happy.  Be sure to build your wall with meaningful items.  Start by using one inspirational piece that can be the guide to choosing all of your selections.  You don't necessarily need to put this piece in the center.  Be creative!   

5.  Now you are ready to hang it up.  Groupings look best when the items are spaced close together (approximately 1 to 2 inches apart).  Begin by hanging your middle pieces at eye level (about 5 feet off of the floor) and then build around them. 

Artwork is an easy way to enhance your home decor if it is done correctly and does not end up looking like clutter on the walls.

Are you a busy mom?  So many of my clients are.  They have young children and/or teenagers.  They either work full-time out of the home, part-time at home or are a stay-at-home mom.  Their life is filled with time constraints, a long list of things to do and a feeling of overwhelm.  Their husbands are great but they just can't seem to understand what it's like to manage it all.  

Does this sound familiar? 

If so, BUSY MOMS! THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU!

I want you to know that I get it!  I feel your overwhelm and frustration.  I know how you have tried to get your home and your life organized, but just can't seem to get it done. I want you to know that it is normal to feel that you are a failure and you just can't understand how this happened!  I know that your expectations of yourself and your spouse's expectations of you are more than you can live up to.  But the truth is, you are not a failure!  

So many moms tell me "I know how to get organized, but I just can't."  I speak with so many moms who contact me simply because they feel frozen and overwhelmed.  

I want you to keep in mind that gathering great ideas on "how" to get organized is not always enough. Just having the ideas does not necessarily create enough time, space, discipline and motivation to actually carry through your ideas.

The reality is, it's just not enough to think you can do it.  You need to stop wasting your time and move forward. The longer it goes on, the worse it will become.  I am here to help you stop the chaos and get organized, once and for all.  And the good news is, I am just a phone call away! 

I urge you to acknowledge that it's time to pick up that phone and contact me.  I ask that you think enough of yourself to reach out to me and get some help.  There is no shame in admitting you are overwhelmed.  Busy moms like you are, more so than not, frustrated, overwhelmed and not even sure how to begin the process. These are the most common statements I hear when I get that phone call.  

Are you ready to stop feeling this way and learn the tools you need to get and stay organized? I work with busy moms just like you to help carve out the time, create a solid plan and keep you motivated to get the job done. 

Follow through on your intent to have A Better Space, because thinking about it is just not enough.

I will be here when you are ready.

So many times, my clients and potential clients want to know how I do it.  How do I keep my own home organized when I am so busy organizing others?  I found a video on line that explains, quickly, how it gets done.  

https://www.facebook.com/ELLEDECORmag/videos/10153174978241710/ 

The key is maintanence on a small scale.  It does not require a lot to keep it going after the initial organizing has been completed.

When you have a home for everything and everything is put in its place, it is easy to keep it maintained.  

I hope this short video gives you some ideas and inspiration about what to do after your home gets organized. Knowing how to maintain an organized home is the second step in getting organized.

If you are looking to take that first step and create a home and life that you "love" this month, don't hesitate to contact A Better Space.

I am here to help and have lots of great ideas and inspiration so you can maintain your home on a daily basis, too!

I know it's been a while since I last wrote a blog.  I have been spending some much needed time on my own home for a change.  

I decided at the end of 2015 that I was going to go through my home and thoroughly declutter, clean and organize each and every room of my home. I had been so busy last year organizing others that I, unfortunately, neglected my own home.  It was quite an undertaking, I must admit, but the results are great!

I feel so much better when I walk throughout my home now.  I went through my second floor in November and the first floor in December and am finishing up my basement this month.  

I took time to assess my possessions and ask myself if I really needed everything I had.  The answer was an astounding "NO"! I went through my wardrobe, including my collection of shoes and accessories, got rid of old nick knacks that no longer represented who I am, organized closets, cabinets, shelves, drawers and hung some new artwork.  I gathered quite a large number of items for donation and for sale and a lot for the trash.

I organized my home office to get ready to rock it in 2016 and moved old files and paperwork into my storage area of my home to archive.  I went through all of my filing cabinets and got rid of four boxes of paperwork at a recent shredding event too.  

One of the things I paid attention to was whether or not I needed to repurpose any of the areas of my home.

When was the last time you did that?  When was the last time you looked around your home and identified areas or rooms in your home that no longer serve you?  

Have your children grown up and no longer need a play room?  Has one of your children gone off to college or gotten married and no longer lives at home?  Is that well-intended exercise room no longer being used?  Do you no longer spend time in the living room, but rather use the family room instead?

It is so important to use your real estate.  If a room in your home is no longer being used as it was originally intended, it's time for a change.

Start to re-purpose a room by eliminating what no longer suits you.  Determine how that space can be better used and re-create a room that you love.  Add a fresh coat of paint and perhaps an area rug to give it a fresh look. 

Perhaps you do not have a home office and the paperwork in the home ends up everywhere.  Wouldn't it be great to have a dedicated room where all of the paper management in the home can live?  You could turn your unused living room or a bedroom into a home office.  

How about that sitting room you have always wanted?  How about taking an unused bedroom and creating a dressing room?  The possibilities are endless.  

You don't need to have a living room if you don't use one.  You don't need to keep a bedroom unused.  It could become a home office, a work-out room, a sitting room or whatever you have envisioned that you would like to have.

Take some time and go through your own home and look at it with fresh eyes and see how you can repurpose your home.  "The purpose" of your home is to create an environment that you use and love to spend time in.

If you need assistance creating a room that you love, some interior redesign might be the solution.  Feel free to contact me to talk about your particular situation.

Until next time, happy organizing!